On Reincarnation

When I was young, around 6 or 7 years old, I always had a nightmare. In my dreams, I was a boy, alone and scared, running in a corridor of a creepy dark building. It seemed to me that building was a hospital. At least, it looked one. And this was confirmed in my next dream where I saw grim-faced doctors saving (or hurting?) someone. 

These dreams were recurrent and it had different scenes at different times. At one time, I was trying to escape with another child through the windows and we were both standing at the window sill. At another time, I saw myself standing in front of the building - the hospital. And at another time, I jumped off the building, only to be caught by several men in green uniforms and they are laughing.

At one time, I was walking towards the basement of the building. It was dark, and I peeped at one of the rooms with door left ajar. It was dimly-lighted and I saw a what looked like doctors trying to torture someone who was tied on the bed. The doctors were laughing or saying something, I can't really remember. I was so afraid that I woke up.

So recurrent were these nightmares that even in my young age, I already developed coping mechanism to save myself from dying while asleep. I forced myself to wake up whenever I realized I am in a bad dream. I did this several times until those bad dreams go away.

When I was in my late 30s, me and my friends went to Phnom Penh Cambodia. I don't really believed in reincarnation until I saw the Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum. It felt like I have been there before. And when I went down the corridor and found it closed, I panicked. It felt like my childhood nightmares came to life.

I left my friends and rested at the canteen in front of the museum. I saw the full view of the building. And it was very similar to the building in my dreams.

Did I die in this building? I was born in 1976 and the building became a prison cell in the same year. 

I also dreamed that I can fly. Like a Garuda, I dreamed that I was flying up above the skies and the over mountain and trees. It seemed like I traveled through the night from Cambodia to the Philippines. Then ended up walking in an empty street, where my new family would live and where I would be dreaming these dreams.

On Gambling

I have heard stories about people and even friends, who are addicted to gambling and who lost their fortunes, families and lives because of it.

Gambling in government-ran gaming institutions is legal in the Philippines. Somehow, it is a state mechanism for preventing the accumulation of resources in the hands of the few and redistribution of these resources via social projects.    

Have you ever wonder why Balibago in Angeles City is lined with financing companies who are even open even during wee hours in the morning? Gambling fanatics from all over the Philippines converge in Angeles City and Clark Field to gamble legally in casinos that swarmed the area. When they lost, addicted as they are, they wanted play more to hopefully win their money back. They mortgage their cars, land titles, gadgets and jewelries at loan sharks just waiting around the corners. Oftentimes, they go home, broke.    

Emerson, a friend, lives a lowly life with a small salary as staff of a small College. He got addicted to bingo games. Right after payday, he goes to bingo house to play, literally throwing away his salary. He never won. The lure of gambling almost made him act like a zombie. He borrowed money from friends just to gamble. He even mortgaged his family home and gambled off the proceeds, literally his family to the streets. Now, he cannot go home, or his father-in-law will hack him to death. He lost his job and shied away from his family. Family and friends, tired of helping him, shut their doors off him. He is now walking around town, homeless.

Maristela, a good friend, who's business is lending money to these perennial gamblers, told me not to pity on them for they gambled off their money almost recklessly.

Well, its about time for the government to really get serious about fighting off these illegal gambling in the Philippines. 

On Corruption

Corruption in the Philippines happens even when the laws punishing it are tight. The fact remains that in the country, nobody really gets punished for being corrupt. Save, of course, some politicians whose political adversaries aggressively want them behind bars. But this rarely happens. For the corrupt, no matter how unschooled, knows how to corrupt.

With its ubiquitous character, people are now starting to think that corruption is not bad. In an economy where resources are scarce, some politicians even think that corruption is normal. For some who worked in government agencies, it is almost a culture! One need not dig deep to find overpriced goods, services and infrastructure projects in government agencies. These even in the presence of legal mechanisms that ensures transparency and fairness in the procurement system.